The Hiester Family in a nutshell - a big one, like a coconut or something

We are a family of a whole bunch of random people, thrown together in one small house, who all happen to look alike. Each member of our family was hand-picked by God... that's the only explanation for the saga that is our family. Here's the story from the beginning... My husband, Todd, was married before me. His wife's name was Carrie, and together they had 3 kids: Tyler, Kurstin & Elissa. Todd's parents were divorced and his mother remarried. Her new husband, Don, had 2 small children: Ally & Wesley. Their natural mother was killed in a car accident when they were 8 & 11. One year later, they lost their dad and Todd and Carrie took them into their home. 6 months after Ally & Wesley were added to the household, Carrie died of cancer at age 26. Her own children were 3, 6 & 9 and Ally & Wesley were 10 & 13. And Todd was alone with them. Think Lord of the Flies. So when I fell in love with Todd, I got these 5 kids as a bonus. We married about a year and a half into our relationship, with the kids as our wedding party. We made it all official with an adoption lawyer and lots of money, ensuring that we are LEGALLY their parents. They even had to take oaths saying they would perform the duties of sons and daughters, which I think means I have someone to change my diapers when the time comes! After 2 years of marriage we added Robben Carey to the mix. And now we've welcomed Livi Claire...the seventh, and final, Hiester kid (unless, of course, God has other plans). Todd and I are 37 and 35, respectively, and our kids range in age from 1 to 21. It's great because we're cool and always the youngest in a crowd of high school parents.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Unorthodox Utterances of an Urologist

How many times can you honestly say you've left a doctor's office in hysterics? Happy ones, that is. Today we had a follow-up appointment for Robben's peepee. Good thing he can't read, yet. He had a surgery last week by an Urologist, who happens to be an "artist". Which means that Robben now has a masterpiece in his pants! Well, today we went to this follow-up and ended up in the waiting room for probably about 45 minutes. Being an active one-year-old, Robben was doing lots of crawling, walking, talking and yelling during this extended wait. Of course, it was his new word that he's yelling repeatedly for all to hear: "COCK! COCK! COCK!" What better place than a peepee doctor's office!?! So when the doctor finally sees us, there's not much to do but remove the diaper and have a little look-see. Dr. Ambati, an older Indian fellow with a kind smile and thick accent, shakes Robben's hand and says, "Congratulations my friend, you have a perfectly straight penis." Then he turns to me and says, "Now you will have no complaints from your daughter-in-law." I'm laughing now, but things take a turn for the funnier. Todd says, "Now maybe you can fix mine." (don't even ask) The doctor says, "Oh, you want me to make it bigger?" Todd says, "Not me!" and grabs my shoulder to imply I've made such a request! Then Dr. Ambati responds with, "It is every man's dream to be able to throw it over his shoulder!!!" Then he asks me, as though innocent, why my face has turned all red. Todd and I both left in stitches -and not the kind Robben's peepee had.
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2 comments:

  1. Logan and AmyFebruary 14, 2009 at 10:42 AM

    I can't help but laugh when Robben says his new word cock. I must say your family is a hoot to be around. You guys are funny!!

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  2. AHFebruary 15, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    So...can I ask a question here? How did Robben get a hold of the his new favorite word? You've mentioned it a few times in the blog & the stories around it are hilarious but I feel like I missed out on the great story of The Beginning! Is he meaning something else that sounds close to Cock? Please inform :)

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